An Orderly Life

How come this article is under the head of "Orderly Life" ? Are we not maintaining an "Orderly Life" now? - You all may question. I have the following answer.

In the earlier days, students maintained a kind of discipline. The educational system has an in-built command of respecting the teachers from day one of entry into the school. Masters were not fun makers, neither the students. The absolute relationship between a Master and a Student was more than a Parent and a child. Masters were straining to mould their students in a very refined manner and there were days when Masters hearts filled up with lot of joy when they observe the student performing more finer than the master himself. A kind of dedication to the role responsibility was seen in "Masters of yester years". And the same is missing now. There is more or less a commercial binding between a master and a student. These days, the students demand a kind of easy life and treat their masters as their equals and most often make fun of their teachers.

Co-education was also existent in those days but it has not gone to an ugly presentation. The Girls maintained decorum and they used to go to school keeping up a dignified dress. There was no occasion for the Girls to present the physical features of their bodies and this codified dress system actually helped them to keep the boys cool and calm without any specific irritation. The parents of yesteryears too were very specific on the dress code and they used to keep a strict watch on the movements of their children. Similarly, Teachers were also closely watching the movements of their students and timely action was possible to avoid any unto-do incident.

A comparative study of Child behaviour speaks that the Students of these days are let free by their parents and this has given a freedom to the children to move closely with all types of students and the dress fashions of the Girls, unfortunately alluring the boys and this is further let free by the Teachers due to volume of work load or "minding their business attitude" whatever we call. As a result, boys and girls are freely mingling with each other forgetting the very purpose of their educational base. This is virtually seen in the latest incidents of the boys throwing acid bottles on the faces of the Girls and killing the Girl Students etc.

Teacher-student relationship too strained very much due to the recent films while many films are produced making fun of the teachers in a class room. This media over powered the brains of the students and caused a serious damage to the system itself. The laxity of the law and order situation is another such, which worsened the situation. Finally, there is no watch dog in the system itself to check the movements of the students as a result the students are enjoying a "feel free" attitude.

How does the relations continued

Till recently the relationship continued in a fine manner, but then, there are reasons. The festivals of India mostly helped the family traditions to remain in tact. There are colorful festivals like Holi etc where all family members, for that matter, all persons in the local area join and celebrate a game like which enables them to come closer. These festivals were conducted amidst a very healthy and lively atmosphere where not only the family members, but many known and unknown join at one place and express the spirit of oneness. Photographs are taken and preserved and it is very common that when the look at the photographs of yesteryears where they joined the families, their eye brows were up, lot of smiles on the face with all sweet memories and that is all can not be written on this small piece of note book, but, surely to be experienced.

In the recent days, the tendency started changing, due to search of a job etc the children migrated to different places, and they could not reach their parents for celebrating a festival or so and the gap started widening.

There are interesting festivals like "brother and sisters festival" which is observed on the third bright day after Diwali. Brothers should go to the place of their sisters and the sister should cook food and offer the same to her brother with all affection. This is still being continued in many parts of India which is helping the Indian family to remain close and maintain the relationship.

Diwali is yet, another festival which is celebrated with all fire works; distribution of sweets; and many such.

In southern Parts of India, Bhogi, Sankranti are celebrated as the first festivals in the month of January every year. The reason behind this was, most farmers used to get their crop home by that time, as such, it is common to cook using the new produce like rice etc and celebrate the festival.

Ugadi, the year beginning was also treated as one of the best festivals of India which normally comes in the month of March every year.

To speak, the ancient tradition helped Indian families to come close at least once in a month in the name of some festival or other like, the month of January-Bhogi or Sankranti; the month of February - Maha Shivarathri for Lord Shiva and Radha Saptami or worshipping of Lord Sun; the month of March - Ugadi or new year celebrations and Holy - A colorful festival; the month of April - Sri Ramanavami in the name of Lord Rama; the month of May - Lord Hanuman Birth day; the month of June and July - Guru Poornima or Respects to the masters; the month of August-Goddess Lakshmi Worship in some parts of Indian and in some other parts entire month is a festive season; the month of September - Vinayaka Chaturdhi and also offering of oblations to the departed souls in the family; the month of October - again a total festive month due to Dasara and Dewali; the month of November - again a total festive month in the name of worship to Lord Shiva in Kartik Maas; the month of December - again a total festive month due to millions of people observing Ayyappa Deeksha or Bhavani Deeksha etc to regulate their food and other habits and gearing up health wise by observing a forty day season on these matters and this is done irrespective of caste or any such.

Thus more or less, the festivals of India are keeping the Indian families together and these festivals keep the activity of all sections people as an on-going one.


In the meantime celebrations in the families, like marriages, naming ceremony, tonsuring ceremony, new baby and a hundreds of such, besides there are specific festivals for each branch of the Hindus in different regions and they differ from family to family and region to region - and in one point - 364 DAYS ARE FESTIVE DAYS which kept the families always active and enjoying the time with family and friends, besides this, these festivals helped the traders too largely.

The concept

Some great sage of Indian origin said - there is no bad mother on the earth, and then, why there are bad children? No child surely can grow well in the absence of love and affection primarily from the mother. This is a common phenomenon amongst all living beings on the earth. Initially mother takes care of the child and any new born (either an animal or a bird or a human) looks for the lovely touch of a mother and the new born starts growing with that only. This is a fact of life in any sect, in any religion and in any country for that matter.

Parents are mostly unpaid servants and the service rendered by a parent to their child is surely not having any matching reward or remuneration. This a fact of life. Parents, mostly desire to bring the children up in life and desire their unfulfilled ambitions, be fulfilled through their children. Which means a high expectation on the children - quite psychologically. During the course of the process, probably parents may try to impose high degree of discipline and parents might want that each minute of the child's time to be converted to the productive set goals. On many occasions this may lead to friction and a child might develop hatred, since he does not enjoy freedom of his choice. This becomes the possible poisonous seed initially planted in the brain of a child which starts getting similar fruits over a period of time mostly after marriage.

In the early days Indian Parents used to hold high ambitions on their children and the mind set normally was to remain with the children at their old age in the joint family system of Indian family life. Normal parents of ancient India brought their children up with a view to upkeep their traditional and professional skills to continue in the family. Their attachment to their profession was extremely well and they never used to think that their children to skip off from their inherited professions. For example, a potter desired his children to turn out be a better potter and never there were intentions to make the potters child a doctor or so on. This attitude gradually changed and children were brought out of the parental profession and they were given freedom of their goal in their studies beyond the scope of family tradition.

This became the origin to keep the children away from parental profession and detachment to the place of stay of the parents. Which means migration started depending on the need of the job and career choosen. However the traditions of India kept the family intact and that is what is going on still, though it started diluting now-a-day.

My dear Children

My dear children
We wish you all a prosperous future, eventful and purposeful life.
Why did I create this blog for you especially? - you may ask.

My answer - my heart is known to my parents as well my likes and dislikes since they brought me up in an Indian Family Atmosphere where co-existance and sharing of thoughts amongst the family members is common.

But

how do you know the heart of your parents and their expectations. Many a times parents can not open their heart and speak with their children as the age of the children grow. The communication between a parent and a child differs at different levels of ages. Why should there be a sudden disliking between each when both the groups were so affectionate at one point of time. Is it relating to a sudden change in the attitude of either of them or is it due to circumstances that lead them to such an abnormal level or is it due to a growing gap between demand and supply ? What would have been the reason for widening the relationship between both the groups and why once a sweet heart - turning out to a bitter taste in later days - is a matter of discussion here.

Here - one specific point to be minded - "I or WE" expression does not mean myself personally and it is a general term used on behalf of the parents. Why should I write on behalf of parents at large?. Not necessarily I alone should write, but it is a freedom of expression and any one can surely add their opinion freely in this site so that mutual discussion and understanding shall become possible.

Probably I am failing to aspect the subject from a western culture point of view and it might be circling through Indian Family Culture and brought up, I do not deny. But then, this may be of some interest if not to the present generation, atleast to the upcoming generations over a period of time if at all they desire to know what the yesteryears parents were and what their mind was.